Hey guys! Looks like we have a holiday on our hands!
Well we did, anyway. Exciting, no? I feel like people don't give enough credit to Presidents Day because not enough people care about American History because not enough people are Huge Fucking Nerds like me. Which is clearly a problem.
So I made a list!
I bring you:
SINCLAIR'S TOP THREE PRESIDENTS.
3. Jimmy Carter.
What isn't to love about this dude. He's a huge humanitarian and a generally Good Guy (and, I frequently get told this is why he was a 'meh' president) and look! He's riding a bike! He's the only president to date that's won the Nobel Peace Prize after his presidency, he used to be a fucking peanut farmer, and Lil Wayne wrote a song about him*. So in his words "Ain't no mother fucker harder than Carter".
*I don't think 'President Carter' was actually about Jimmy Carter but I really like that song so uh.
2. Lincoln.
I know I know, what a boring fucking number 2. I could go off but what it comes down to is this guy saved our fucking country from itself. Not a whole lot of folk survive civil war and we did, thanks to this guy. Also, a few reliable sources think that he might have had aspergers syndrome! HOW FUCKING COOL IS THAT.
1. TEDDY. FUCKING. ROOSEVELT.
You are the only republican I will ever love, Teddy. You are crazy and passionate and kind of a resilient douchebag. You got shot in the middle of a speech, finished it, and then went to the hospital. Ugh. Also you made meat safe and not as gross.
RUNNER(S) UP:
Taft.
You fat fuck.
Clinton.
I would hang out with him. I don't even care.
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